I'm sorry..

This is probably pretty close to how you must be feeling..

I'm just sorry i can't do it myself..

Inspiration.. Where art thou?

Evening lovelys..


I'm so glad Chritmas is over. Wasn't all that great to be honest.
Spent the week alone. =|


I'm been feeling quite uninspired lately..
It's putting me in a horrid mood..

I spent 98% of today lying in bed. I couldn't even muster up the energy to pick up my guitar..

I spent the majority of the day thinking about my next tatts.
I'm heaps keen to get my sleeve done..
But i've got a few others to do before i get started on that.
My next one i'll be getting as soon as possible. =D

I spent the rest of the day pondering over whether to let my hair grow out or not..
I'm letting it get longer as well.
But i kind of miss it looking like this..

Photo by Torpore on Flicke

I think my sister's cat has run away.. =|
We spent the afternoon walking around the neighbourhood calling out it's name.. Hope she comes home soon..

I can't wait to leave this town. Start all over again in a new city.
With new people. And the boy i love.
It's going to be hard. But It'll be worth it.
I hope..

xo

Not quite dead yet.

Don't freak just yet.
I'm still alive. I just haven't posted in awhile..

I'm freaking out that it's Christmas on Friday and i haven't bought anything yet. Eep!
Gahh I didn't get enough time. haha

I love Christmas time.
I love seeing houses covered in pretty lights and decorations.

I won't be doing anything for Christmas this year..
But i don't mind. House to myself for a few days. haha

Hello life =)

Sup bitches?

I got my Tattoo!

=)

I Absolutely love it!

I got it done today with Adon. =) He got three black and red nautical stars across his arms and it pretty much looks amazing. =) Not quite amazing as mine.. But still pretty rad. Hehe. <3

Parkway Drive concert last night was pretty fucking insane. xD I've got bruises everywhere! lol and a big bump on my head and my body just hurts all over. =( But it was still fun, we were soaking wet. Totally gross. Haha

Bitch time...

I'm sorry if my jealousy makes you angry.. I just find it so difficult to believe you sometimes. Don't get me wrong, I DO believe you.. It's just.. Some of the things you say to her.. I don't even know.. =( It feels like i'm in a competition or something.. That dream really really freaked me out last night hey.. I honestly just wanted to bawl my eyes out, I would have if you weren't there.. But you were and you just held me.

But, uhm, I'm sorry okay? And, I love you.

<3

Okay, i'm going to go finish packing the last of my stuff. Move tomorrow. =)

Packing and Gossip Girl =D

Hello!

Birthday was nice. =)

Present list included lots of sexy underwear, yummy alcohol, tea cups and a subsricption to Frankie!

I didn't get drunk, i only had like, 5 drinks. Haha

We went to the Casino and i won lots of monies on the pokies and everyone was jealous. Hehe

Then we went to a couple clubs then i got tired and my feet were hurting so we went home.
Haha.

Where The Wild Things Are was a good movie, weird but good. =)

My friends were having breafast in the city at some insane hour in the morning the next day. But Adon and I were like, let's not. Haha so we stayed in bed and snuggled instead. =)

Then Adon, Roey, Heath and I went and saw Zombieland and that was rad. Haha Brainnsssss nom nom nom. =D

I'm in the middle of packing all my shit up yet again because i'm moving into my sisters house on sunday. I've got like three days and i've hardly packed anything. lol And i won't be able to get any done over the weekend because Adon and I are going to the city to see Parkway Drive! Then on Saturday we're getting our Tatts! =D So so so keen for that!

Okay, I found this and it's pretty much the coolest thing everr!

http://www.msplinks.com/MDFodHRwOi8vc2xpbmtlcnMuZGV2aWFudGFydC5jb20vYXJ0L05ldy1Nb29uLUEtU3VtbWFyeS0xNDQ4NTk2MTY=

I should get back to packing, then sleep cos i gotta get up early in the morning to buy my bookshelf! Whoo! Lol.

So yeah, sleep time now.

xo

Happy birthday too meeeeeee.. =D

Good evening lovelys =)



It feels like i haven't blogged in forever.
Haha
It's my birthday in a couple hours! 18! Zomg!
Legal at last.
Now i can get a loan!
And a debit card!
And hire a hooker!
And buy a packet of smokes. Lol
Not that i would.. For the last one anyway.. =P

I'm heaps excited. =D
I bought this really pretty dress. =)


Looookkkkk! =D








I'm going out to dinner with my boyfriend, sister and some of my close friends then going out!
I don't think i'll drink much though. Haha

Well It's going to have more class than my ex best friends 18th that's for sure.
Yeah she went to the local pub, got smashed and had dirty strippers all over her. Yeah Sophie, real classy..
*eye roll*




Oh! We're going to see Where The Wild Things Are tomorrow too! Yay!
Er, We being Adon and I <3





A really close friend told me she was Bi today.
My reaction - "Have you ever had a crush on me?? =D"
Her - "Err, No."
Me - *Awww* =(
Haha it was pretty damn funny. =)



You know what? I kinda secretly want to grow a beard. But like a sexy beard, Haha..
Wait.. I actually saw a lady with a beard today, It didn't look good at all.. It was like seeing a car crash.. It was horrible yet i couldn't stop staring...
Hmm.. Okay so, I kinda secretly want to be a man, to grow a beard. =D
Is that weird?



Oh wow, I've had this open for so long that I am now 18. Holy Shit.
Son of a mother duck.
I'm a freaking Adult!

You want to know what is the best feeling in the entire world?

Like if i could bottle this feeling, i would just keep it in a jar next to me forever.

I wouldn't sell it for money, because money wouldn't mean anything to me.

It's the way i felt when he said that he was in love with me.

Kind of like being filled with happiness, but more than that. Much more than that.

<333

Confusion...

So.. Things have been happening..

I should stop writing when i feel like this, everything just ends up being so negative. But i kinda treat this like a diary of sorts so yeah, whatevrzz. Like you care anyway?

Feeling lonely right about... Now.
You're not talking to me.. =(
I'm kinda here alone, and you're over there..?

>.<

This girl manages to say everything i'm feeling. check herr out!

http://liv-takeagoodlook.blogspot.com/

I burnt my arms three times at work today..

I want to go on holidays.

I want to go to the beach.

And dip my toes in the water..

And feel the breeze around me..

Anyway..

I've got soo many hours at work this week.. =( Seriously, 43 hours that's not even allowed! Lol

But my pay is gonna be pretty awesome, but still! lol I've got more hours than ANYONE else in the store. =(

Blergghh..

xx

Hum..

Hello lovelys.

I'm still annoyed that my power cord hasn't arrived yet, but i'm amazed at how much i can get done when i'm not on the computer. Haha. And! I actually went to bed heaps early and feel super good. haha.

So! Err.. Not much has been happening..

I swear my Grandma has more social life than i do. LOL!

Seriously she's out all the time. Haha but she's awesome and i love her. =)

I gave my kittie a bath today. Haha it was heaps funny.

And then i went and picked some flowers and now they're making my room all pretty. =)

I just reaslised i've got 5 weekends in a row off! Haha wow!

Oh! And my friends having a goth/fairys party in december and so i've got to sort out a costume. Haha I was trying stuff on last night and i went to show Diddy and he said i looked elegant. Haha, so apparently i'm going as an elegant goth lolol. That should be an interesting night. =D

All righty, i'm going to have some tea. Byeeee!

xoxo

Paranoid much?

This is the truth, I'm feeling...

Tired.

Jealous.

Sick.

And just down right shitty.

Why don't you talk to me like that? Why do you have to act different?

Why can't you tell people?

Really..? You're not interested are you?

I'm going to get drilled over this lol..
But you know what? I'm really over today.. =(

I didn't get home til 3am cos me, Cassie nd Jesse decided to walk past the pub with giant balloons under our shirts and giggling every time we tried to bend over. hahah then we found Wally but we couldn't find the wizard! And Cassie broke the payphone trying to prank call someone. Then we started fights between the black guy and the backpakers.. LOL While we're lying in the middle of the street yelling.. "Where's the popcorn?!"
Hahah. But then it got late and i wanted to go home but i was all the way on the other side of town and i had to walk home becasue i left my wallet at home. And seriously the dark scares the shit out of me. Especially when just as I started walking, a group of guys were walking behind me.. When it's pitch black at 2.40 in the morning and you're by yourself, yeah you woulda been running too. Rofl..

Anyway, then i had to get up at 6 to start work. I just love functioning on less than 3 hours sleep.
Blehhhh.

It's only been a day without my laptop and i'm getting depressed. Kill me now, please.

Go visit my friend Roey's blog, http://www.rainbowroe.blogspot.com she's my best friend and she's awesome and i love her. =D <3 align="center">And on another note, one more week.

I wish you were here... (L)

xoxo

When in doubt, cuddle a teady bear.

Sup ya'll?

Quick shout out to Kodie and Eleanor, Happy birthday dears! xo

Above secret means quite a bit to me.

I don't like this generation either.. I'd much prefer to be living in another decade.. 20's, 30's 40's <3>

Alllll day today i kept thinking it was Wednesday, so at work i was like Yay! I have the day off tomorrow! Then my manager would be like, uhh no you don't, and shatter my happiness. Haha

I stumbled across this today!

Isn't it just the cutest? It's from a girl called Anna, she's only 14 and creating the most beautiful things.. Check out her work here.. http://www.flickr.com/photos/buttercupdays..

Death Cab For Cutieeeee<3 They.Just.Blow.My.Mind.

I really really really want to go see The Time Traveler's Wife, but i don't have anyone to go see it with.. =( Damn you Ollie!

I can't beleive how quickly this year has passed.. My first year out of high school and i haven't achieved anything.. It's going too fast. =(

Gahhh all i have to do is survive the next 10 days and everything will be better<3>

I could be anyone but your friend..

Today was a pretty good day. Apart from sleeping right through my alarm and nearly being late for work.. Haha :D

Work was fine. Michael made my day though. Michael is this kid, and i say kid because even though he's a year older than me, he acts like a freakin 12yr old. LOL.

So he's always hurting himself, or falling over into the most obscure angles and today he gets this bright idea to stick his finger into a hole in this little plastic drip tray thing. Yeah Michael, great idea, except now your finger's stuck and turning purple. Yep that's what happened. We were trying for about 15mins to get this thing off his finger all the while it's turning a dangerous looking purple colour.. bahaha i laughed my fucking arse off. The whole store was laughing. We were this close to calling the ambulance becuase we just couldn't get it off, when we finally cut it off. Funniest thing ever.

I picked up my guitar for the first time in a while tonight.. I just haven't felt inspired lately..

Ahaha, my Itunes is on shuffle and Savage Garden are playing. I secretly love them. And I love the feeling i get when i hear songs like this.. It's like seeing an old friend and remembering everything.. I remember back in primary school my music class had to sing 'Affrimation' And i wanted to do 'I want you' instead but nobody else knew how to do the super fast bit except me and i was all like, aww you guys suck. Haha..

So! Yesterday i got some major shit news. Maximum The Hormone have withdrawn from soundwave next year! D= They were one of the main reasons i wanted to go.. =( Fuckity Fuck. Son of a mother duck..

Oh but then my mood went from happy to shit in one second. My birthday plans are all screwed now.. =(

Bleehhh, let's not think about that yet, we've still got another 25 days till we need to worry bout that. :P

Come with us now on a journey through timeee and space! To the world, of the mightttttyyyy booosshh!<33

xoxo

I know you're just trying to help. But i think you're taking it too far. It's different this time. Take a step back and look at me. See how happy i am now? Isn't that what's important? Shouldn't me being happy make you happy? Stop saying all those things, when you don't even know the half of it.. I'm happy. Even if it is only for a little while. Even if this doesn't work, even if we don't last. I'd rather be happy now and hurt later, than to not be happy at all.. Please just believe me.

Oh how i wish i had the courage to say that. I'm working on it though. She needs to know that this is how i feel..

I know i wasn't going to do anything for the weekend, but now that's it's over, i kinda wish i had done something.. It just feels like a totally waste of time..

I pay off my couches soon. Yay! Furniture! I still need a new tv and bed, but those can wait i guess.

I'm feeling down today, i just feel so blehh.. =(

I need a great big hug.. and some chocolate. Both of which i won't be getting for a while..

I'm going to go watch Beauty and The Beast quite possible one of my favorite childhood movies.. <3

I look around but I can't find you, If only I could see your face..

Above picture is a Ben Zen creation and i'm pretty much in love with him. =D


I felt so sick last night but then i slept for 12 hours and feel really good now.

As i was walking back from the doctors i was walking past the bookshop and remembered that the books we ordered had arrived so i thought i'd be a lovely sister and pay it for her and surprise her at work. We've been so looking forward to these books. They're called The House Of Night novels and they're about vampyres. But not andything like Twilight. So over that shit. I read them before all the hype. Lol. I mean i loved the Twilight books, but then it just got so overrated. And seriously the movie makes me want to vomit. Anyway! The House Of Night novels are fantastic. The first thing i did was flick to the back to see if there's another book and yes! There is, It's called Burned. Whoo! So far in the series there are: Marked, Betrayed, Chosen, Untamed, Hunted And now Tempted! Yay! <3

Hmm.. I've been thinking about this alot lately.. So i have a love/hate relationship with girls with red hair.. My natural hair colour is red and i hate it so i dye it, yay! I see girls with red hair and they all look so elegant and pretty but i can never see myself looking like that. Like Rachel Mcadams in The Notebook And The Time Traveler's Wife.

Anndddd Florence Welch! From Florence and the machine!

Anndddd Alison Sodul from A Fine Frenzy

And Emma from Glee!

They're all so pretty! But i'm thinkng of maybe going back, but not just yet.

In other news... Listening to David Bowie causes broken ankles. I was dancing like an idiot to 'We can be hereos' And totes fell over and hurt my ankle. Uncoordinated much?

Bahaha Ashlea and Chivell are getting fit for my birthday! Parrtttaayyyyy! 28 daysss! That's exciting. But even more exciting is what's happening in 2 weeks! =D <3

The impossible seems possible this time..

I realised my last post, didn't really have much to it. Haha so! Here's another one..

I am home! If only for one night though.. =(

I'm sooo tired from work this morning, i woke up late and had seriously 5 minutes to get dressed and stuff. I was still getting dressed walking into the store. Haha. I fucking hate opens. Jess took one look at me this morning and went, "You're really not a morning person are you?" Lol. No Jess, i'm not.
Well, unless, it's waking up when i want and why and beside whom.. Haha <3

Two more days of work then weekend! I swear to god, i'm just going to be curled up under the blankets watching my fave shows and catching up on all the sleep i've lost this week. Lol.

Rain clouds everywhere...

3 reasons to love the rain..

Of course there are more reasons, like kisses in the rain, and jumping in mud puddles! And the sound it makes when it hits the roof, and the way you can smell it.. <3

Bed time i think..

Night! xoxo

But you're so far away...

Oh herrooo..

Counting down the days..
It's getting closer^^

Work has just been so blehhh for the last few days..

It's been quite chilly for a while now, nobody noticed. I'm terrified.

I want to go home. I miss my kitty. I want to sleep in my own bed. =( It's making me quite upset really.. I'm pretty sure, i need a hug.

There's a whole world down in the ocean. Filled with talking shrimp and boys who call you back, but my breath won't hold long enough..

From up here, everything looks so fucking beautiful.

Hey you guysssss.


You know those days where a whole heap of little things go right and it just makes the whole day seem fantastic? Well, today is one of them =)


Okay, so i wasn't looking forward to closing tonight, but i ended up having such an awesome night!
I had the most fun i've had in a very long time. My boss is fucking epic. I laughed more than i think i ever have. I was on the floor at one stage not being able to breathe at all! Hahaha.
So we finished at around 2.30am ish? Then we mished it out to the 24hr service station, almost lost control of the car! Haha! Then again becuase michael stabbed himself with his name badge and my boss was laughing so hard he could hardly drive. Hung there for for a bit then went home.

James - "Yeah, cos Rynell being at my house isn't going to be weird at all, especially with the big boss sleeping on my couch!" hahaha!

Michael's wet. =D
Funniest night ever. I felt like i was drunk, but i was just having so much fun.
Just got home and it's 3am! Winn!^^


Mmmmm Redbull and skittles.. =D

I has snakebites now =) Annnddd i got quotes for my tatt! The cutest boy ever keeps making me smile like no one else can<3 Annndddd I got the ticket =) So, i ended up doing everything i set out to do! Zing!


Bahh even though the night was well good, i still miss that boy oh so much! <3 You know who you are! Well, maybe, if you're reading this that is.. Haha.

35 dayssss!! XD
Man, i am never going to be able to sleep this hyper. First season of Gossip Girl anyone?

xx

Being in love is totally punk rock.

Hello dears!

I felt really really good today! Despite the fact that i've got a cold =(
I felt like shit last night so it's nice to feel the way i do now.

Going to the city tomorrow to buy my friend a concert ticket so he can mosh it up with us at Parkwayyyy!!! <3 I'm so excited! =D

Closing allllll weekend means i'll have to stay in town, but it'll be alright if it's with Drue or James, Especially Drue haha he'll be so happy! We're going to be really busy though. The Barra Bash AND the bull rides are on.

Uhmmm not much else has happened..

Except, there's this boy, annddddd he's really cute and makes me laugh heaps and i like him lots! JUST CAN'T WAIT for novemberrr! <3

I went and saw my nieces today, my brother's family went away seed collecting for a few weeks and they've only just come back so i went and visited them and oh my goodness
My little niece Lilly-Rose got so big! Haha she is the cutest thing ever! And her sister Annabelle is still the little cutie<3>

That's Lilly-Rose, she's a little older now though.
Annndddd this is Annabelle =)

I being an aunty =)

I love this time of year, all the pretty frogs come out! haha just had to get one out of the bathroom. I never understood how people get scared of them. lol They're so cute.

Haha well i'm off now.

Byeeeee xo

Children don't grow up, our bodies get bigger but our hearts get torn up..

Mondays equal party? Yayyyy! I have just about every Monday off. That's all going to change soon! i'll actually get weekends off, hooraahh!

I slept in til 11.30 ish today. It felt fantastic.

In other news, i'm feeling very conflicted. About boys..

I honestly don't know what to do.

Everybody needs to read the House of Night novels to know what i'm feeling.

Ahh i saw my friend yesterday! She made me laugh heaps and i love her.<3

We're going to go to the Woolshed cos they let you dance on the tables!

Blehh.. Stomache crampsss.. =(

No fun at all.

Oh well, i'm going to go watch the entire series of Harry Potter<3<3

xox

:)

Hello!

The last couple of days have been pretty awesome.
Issue 32 of the adorable Frankie came out, i ran straight from work to the newsagents just in time to get my bi-monthly fix =)
To be honest i haven't had a chance to read the whole thing yet But! From the few pages i have read it appears to be just as aweosme as ever.

The last two days of work have been funny as hell.
There are all these new girls and we're around the same age and we just get along so well, it makes work bearable.
The store was dead quite so me and another girl, Jesse were just walking around then i went to open the door for an old couple and i was pulling it and pulling it, and i was like " Why isn't this opening?!?" And Jesse was like, " Err.. Push, Nell."
hahah Funniest thing ever, we all just dissolved into giggles.
I was so full of shame. Aha.


I bought a skirt the other week while i was visiting my friends and when i put it on it had a button missing right on the front, revealing my undies to the world. So now, i'm sewing the spare button on. Annndd i just pricked my finger, how nice. haha

I fucking LOVE Glee.


<3

We're adults now and we can do whatever we want =)

Hectic weekend. =(

Work was really really horrid. I had to stay at my sister's house, annndd i just realised i left my toothbrush there! Thank Murphy I still have my old one. haha

I have the day off tomorrow, maybe i'll go for a drive somewhere i haven't been before. =)

Feeling a little lonely tonight. I think maybe because sunday night's are like my friday night's and monday and tuesday are my weekend, so i used to go out all the time. But, now.. Well, my social life is pretty much non exsitant. Apart from work, and seeing my friends,Roey and Heath every now and then I do nothing. Haha

I know everyone goes on a bout it, but it truely is a great thing. I'm talking of course about PostSecret. =)

This weeks secrets are nice.

My new favorite thing? http://www.textsfromlastnight.com/ fucking awesome.

Well ima have a shower now. No wait! a bubblebath!!

byeeee..

xo

S-s-s-stalking!<3

I like people watching. It's fun. You go, you sit on a patio or something with a friend, and you watch people go by. The two of you can make up little stories in your head for them. I mean, I think we make up little stories for people in our heads anyway, on an unconscious level. Stereotyping is a part of that. But when you're people watching you think about it more.

But what's even more fun, especially if you live near a college or university, is to get up high, at night. Not too high, but above head-level. In a tree, or on a ledge in shadows. And then you and your friend just sit quietly, and you sit still, and you wait for groups of people going to and from parties, or to and from friends' houses, and you listen. You get a snatch of conversation, here or there. It's like people watching, except you can get a bit closer to them. It's almost like for a brief second you can hear their thoughts. People listening! Another hobby that's just one step closer to stalking! - A quote from a guy called Joey.

But stalking's so easy to do now isn't it. The internet just makes it so damn simple. Say for instance, the guy you dated then broke up with is still your friend on facebook. Just one click away and you're got all his status updates, when he's home for example and you just happen to be walking by his house.. Or what times he's going out to the pub and you just happen to bump into him there..
I'm quite over him though. No really, I've even limited my Fb stalking to three times a week.

My friend and I recently came across this guy who worked at a certain gaming store.. We ended up going there every week on different days so that we could figure out what days he has off, Tuesdays and Wednesdays. We then hunted him down and added him on facebook, now we knew that his hobbies included fire twirling and we just happened to bring that up in our next conversation with him at work.. Andd we googled him =) We're yet to find out where he lives..


But is this all this knowledge really such a good thing? For me personally, i think i get more depressed knowing what my ex has been doing. I'd rather be ignorant of these things thank you very much.


And also, the internet is pretty fucking scary. I was recently just browsing through friends pages and what not and stubbled across naked photo's of a girl i went to school with. Didn't ever really need to see her bush. I'm not saying she didn't look good naked, just that it was kinda awkward. Even if it's art.

Blehh i feel wrecked.
Ima sleep now =)



xo

Hello

Oh, Haiiii!

Day off today! And what have i done so far? Well! i slept in til 11, watched chick flicks all morning and just quite alot of nothing. I love days like these =)

My Friend sent my a link last night of this loverly website and i just love it!

It's it just the cutest?

Anyway, the Relay for Life is next month and i have to start fundraising for it! I'm busking. =)

Ahh.. I'm so broke. It's making me quite depressed. I need more money.

I want to take some time off from work, but i don't think i'll be able to this close to christmas..

Hum, my friend's are coming home from uni soon. I hope things haven't changed much.

It's really really hot here, i wanna go swimming.

xo